Good afternoon and welcome to JP’s Week One Predictions. My favorite thing about week one predictions is that you usually get off to a fast start with looking like a genius. This weekend’s slate of games is so weak that even Danny Sheridan could get it mostly right. With that being said, the only “real” two games with National Championship implications involve SEC teams. For the purpose of this blog, I’ll mainly stick with predicting the SEC with a few exceptions. This week I’m going to keep in chronological order.
WEEK 1
Mississippi State vs. Memphis @ Graceland
Miss. State is a 30 point favorite.
Mississippi State heads to Memphis and the home of the Delta Blues and countless bad Elvis personators to open up the SEC football season against C-USA perennial powerhouse Memphis. Unfornately for Memphis, this is not a basketball game. However, Mississippi State may put up a basketball like numbers in the Liberty Bowl. I like for Megan Mullen’s Bullies to cover.
Mississippi State 42, Memphis 7
Kentucky vs. Western Kentucky… in Nashville
Kentucky is a 19.5 point favorite.
The battle for Kentucky kicks off game two of the SEC season… in Nashville. John Calipari looks to reload and return the Wildcats to the NCAA. Joker Phillips is looking over his shoulders for Batman, which could be anyone in the SEC, except Vandy. The Wildcats lost a lot off last year’s team, but they are playing a team nicknamed the Hill toppers. I’ll take the Wildcats to cover.
Kentucky 38, WKU 17
Utah State Vs. Auburn in God’s Country
Auburn is a 21 point favorite
The Barrett Trotter pencil moustache era kicks off in Auburn this weekend against a team that gave Oklahoma a scare last year. There are lots of new faces on the field for Auburn, but just too much talent and depth for me to see this game being competitive into the second half. I expect this to be a lot like the Arkansas State game last year minus Cam Newton. Look for more fireworks on the edges and for a freshman running back named Tre “De la Soul” Mason.
Auburn 49, Utah State 10
Kent State vs. Alabama @ Jordan Hare West
Alabama is an eleventy billion favorite (38)
Alabama opens the 2011 in defense of their 14th Mythical National Championship. Kent State spent the last couple of day helping a community devastated by disaster. Unfornately for Kent State, Bama has been practicing. Bama is one of the deepest teams in the nation and they will show why this weekend. I expect a shut out.
Alabama 52, Kent State (-4)
BYU vs. Ole Miss @Oxford, King’s College
BYU is a 3 point favorite.
Usually when I hear the Cougars are coming to town I go to get a haircut, some nice clothes and throw on some sex panther cologne on (60% of the time, it works every time!) Unfortunately for me and Ole Miss, it’s not those Cougars. These Cougars left Utah three weeks ago riding bikes and wearing white shirts. That’s right, it’s the BYU Cougars coming to town. To be honest, this is the hardest non-important game to pick. Houston Nutt has a knack for beating teams he shouldn’t and then getting destroyed by teams he should dominate. I never thought I say this, but I miss the days of Ed Orgeron and Brent Schaeffer. Make me eat crow Houston Nutt!
BYU 31, Ole Miss 24
Montana Vs. Tennessee @ Rocky Top
Tennessee is a 20 point favorite
Tennessee tries to avoid losing to another Our Lady of the Blind to open the season (See Wyoming vs. UT, 2008). Derek Dooley shouldn’t have his hands full week one. Unfortunately for him, Janzen Jackson probably will somewhere else. I expect Tennessee to struggle early and then pull away and cover. Hopefully the Knoxville PD won’t have to get involved for Montana’s sake.
Tennessee 34, Montana 13
Missouri State vs. Arkansas @middle of nowhere
Arkansas is a 42 point favorite
Arkansas opens the season vs. a Div 1-AA opponent again. Just say the name Tyler Wilson like Tennessee fans said Eric Berry. I predict a coming out party for him. Fortunately for Tyler, this is the type of coming out party that they tolerate in Arkansas. However, I don’t see them covering.
Arkansas 49, SE Missouri State 14
Florida International vs. Florida @some swamp in Florida
Florida is a 35 point favorite
Florida keeps it local to open the BOOM Era in Gainesville. Charlie Weiss’s appetite for destruction and Big Mac’s will reign supreme on Saturday Night. I expect John Brantley to finally look halfway decent and Jeff Demps to run wild. Florida wins going away for BOOM’s sake and for the small, unsuspecting children in Weiss’s path.
Florida 45, Florida International 7
East Carolina vs. South Carolina@ Legion Field East better known as Columbia fairgrounds
South Carolina is a 21 point favorite.
The key number for Stephen Garcia is six. Avoid pick sixes and suspension number six. Seeing the sign of the devil anyone? The only numbers that East Carolina will remember are 21 (Lattimore) and 1 (Jeffreys). Don’t worry they still ALMOST haunt me too from September of last year. ALMOST
South Carolina 42, East Carolina 17
Elon vs. Vanderbilt @ Nashvegas
Vanderbilt is an 11 point favorite.
Signs of the Apocalypse: Vanderbilt is a double digit favorite. I can almost hear Ole Miss’s almost mascot Admiral Ackbar screaming “It’s a trap!” Then I’m reminded that it’s just Elon. The James Franklin Era begins in Nashville with a win.
Vandy 28, Elon 14
Boise State vs. Georgia @Thunderdome
Boise State is a 4 point favorite.
Two teams enter, one teams leaves! Actually, both teams will leave. Just one will leave with their tail tucked between their legs. Since Bulldogs have a nub of one you should see where I’m going with this. Boise is a good team. Mark Richt likes underachieving in Athens. Fortunately for him, this game is in Atlanta. Aaron Murray has a big night, but Isiah Crowell gets humbled. Obedience lessons will be required!
Georgia 31, Boise State 28
Oregon vs. LSU @ Super Thunderdome
LSU is a favorite if there is a bar fight. Otherwise, pick’ em.
Last Year I got to see Oregon first hand on the biggest stage. I believe Auburn left a lot on the table even without an injured Cam Newton. LSU’s big uglies are just bigger and uglier than Oregon’s. I look for Les Miles to taste the artificial turf and decide it’s going to be a good night. Look for LSU to kick ‘em if they are down.
LSU 31, Oregon 24
Possible Upset of the Week
USF 24,Notre Dame 20. Skip Holtz does it for daddy.
These are my uninformed picks and I’m sticking to them until you forget what I typed. Have a great day and War Eagle!
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