JP's Quick and Dirty SEC Preseason Predictions.

Good Afternoon and welcome to JP’s preseason predictions.  Fall camp is done and we are literally just a day away from kickoff of the SEC football season on Thursday Night.  Mississippi State will be taking on Memphis in the home of the Delta Blues and Kentucky will be playing Western Kentucky in… wait for it… Nashville.  How two Kentucky teams end up playing in Tennessee on Thursday night is beyond me.  I’m guessing the men’s basketball team has practice on Saturday in Lexington and they wanted to make sure they didn’t interfere. But in all seriousness, I can’t fault these teams for wanting to play elsewhere. If I lived in Kentucky I would be trying to get away too.  But enough of my rambling about Kentucky and onto my short, but sweet SEC Preseason predictions…

I’m sure most of you who are reading this have spent countless hours on message boards and reading fine periodicals like Lindy’s educating yourself about the 2011 season so I’m going to keep it simple.  In an effort to keep this politically correct I’m going to address each team with a short compliment sandwich. First I’ll type something positive, and then negative, and then a positive to finish it off.  So here we go:

SEC West

Alabama.

Great defense, Suspect at quarterback and wide receiver, Great rushing attack which is nicely attired.

Predicted record:             10 – 2   

Why?:  SEC West in minefield, Defense will set tempo. QB is huge question mark.

Better if:  QB is effective and a real game manager.

Worse if:  Trent Richardson gets hurt.

Arkansas.

Great offense, broken ankles suck, bacon… everybody loves bacon!

Predicted Record:            10 – 2

Why?:  Bacon is nutriti… I mean Petrino is great offensive mind, going to miss Kniles Davis in the 4^th quarter. Bacon.

Better if:  Tyler Wilson lives up to hype.

Worse if:  Defense hasn’t improved.

Auburn.

Dynamic offense, forever young, finally some depth

Predicted Record:            8 – 4      

Better if:  The team is whisked away from Never Never land and grows up fast, Barrett Trotter shaves mustache.

Worse if:  All the “experts” are right.  Danny Sheridan does not count.

LSU.

Great defense, Les Miles, overall depth

Predicted Record:            10 – 2

Better if:  They have effective quarterback play

Worse if:  Jordan Jefferson “gets out of jail” OR Les Miles taste the grass and sees his shadow.

Ole Miss.

Admiral Ackbar, Black Bear, Houston Nutt – only one of these belong

Predicted Record:            5 – 7

Better if:  Houston Nutt gets fired midseason

Worse if:  How could it get much worse?  You have a Black Bear as your mascot.

Mississippi State.

Depth, Megan Mullins and her cowbell, Croom’s recruits

Predicted Record:            7 – 5

Better if:  Get off to a hot start

Worse if:  QB play is ineffective OR unable to find “rented mule”

SEC East

Florida.

Gainesville’s got Talent, Charlie Weiss’s diet, team speed

Predicted Record:            7 – 5      

Better if:  Didn’t have to play UT, Bama, LSU, Auburn and FSU

Worse if:  Charlie Weiss is not fed OR Neil Callaway’s Blazers are set to “STUN”

Georgia.

Ten years of depth and talent, wasted talent, 200 bars in Athens

Predicted Record: 8 – 4

Better if:  Survive Chick-fil-A Thunderdome and Spurrier

Worse if:  Richt keeps his job.

Kentucky.

Midnight Madness is October 15, Walls went pro, Nobody notices football

Predicted Record:  6 – 6

Better if:  Find a way past Florida or Mississippi State

Worse if:  Calipari starts losing in November

South Carolina.

Fifth Suspension is a charm, high expectations, Alshon and Marcus

Predicted Record:  9 – 3

Better if:  Garcia doesn’t make it six, as in suspension or pick

Worse if:  See above.

Tennessee.

Eric Berry Janzen Jackson Pat Martin, lack of depth, off week before Buffalo

Predicted Record:  6 – 6

Better if:  Dooley could keep Players

Worse if: ANYONE gets hurt.

Vanderbilt.

James Franklin, perennial doormat, at least we’re in Nashville

Predicted Record:  4 – 8

Better if:  They beat someone they shouldn’t

Worse if:  They don’t beat Elon in week 1.

So there you have it, my quick and dirty predictions for the SEC season.  No national championship contender. A three way tie in the SEC west and Spurrier does it again… and gets beat in Atlanta by whomever they play.  If you got confused by my preview remember the compliment sandwich: positive, negative, positive.  For those of you wanting a full Auburn preview you’ll have to wait till after week 1.  I won’t be sure what we actually have got until then.  Thanks for reading my quick and dirty preview and War Eagle!

A Quick Update: I'm Alright?

Somewhere, someone is blasting Europe’s smash hit “The Final Countdown” and somewhere, someone is asking them to please turn in down.  Its game week and people are excited!  Our beloved Auburn Tigers begin the season at the insanely early time of 11:00 A.M. this Saturday morning against Utah State.  I’m not happy about this because it keeps me from really enjoying tailgating for the first game.  It also means that the van will make her maiden trip with “The new guys” on Friday night. 

As for the van…

She’s been hanging out the last couple of weeks with Danny Noonan and the boys over at The Caddy Shack in Montevallo.  She had some electrical demons among other things that have been needed to be worked on and our friend/sponsor Tim Nash has had his hands full.   Tim sent us an email last week with a list of everything that is getting fixed this week:

Replace upper and lower hoses

Replace heater hoses

Replace front pads, Machine front rotors

Brake cable broken to right rear brake shoes

Oil Lube and filter

Complete tune up, Plugs, Plug wires, distributor cap and rotor button, fuel filter

De-carbon engine

Transmission service

Rear differential service

Install new drive belt

Replace idle air control valve

Rewire amps and install in a better location and new radio to get rid of electrical wiring

After reading this list I’m not so sure how or WHY we were driving this thing.  My favorite thing I heard from Tim was that he was surprised she hadn’t caught on fire yet from some of the electrical demons.  The Tiger Tail Team Van and fire are never a safe mix.  The van’s trips to Baton Rouge, 2003 and Fayetteville, 2005, are stark reminders of that fact.

As for this weekend our plans are not final.  Due to the early kick and this being our first go around, we are not exactly sure where we will wind up tailgating.  As soon as we know, we’ll pass on the good word.  The only thing I’m fairly certain of is that she will be going down to Auburn on Friday.  Expect at least one more update before Thursday night with predictions for this weekend and season.  Until then, War Eagle! 

Tails from the Road: Calling Baton Rouge

My first trip in the Tiger Tail Team Van occurred almost six years ago in 2005 with a trip to Red Stick.  That’s Baton Rouge to my French speaking friends.  One of the things that I have on my “bucket list” was to see Auburn play in every SEC Stadium.  This was only trip number two and the first one since I had been “between the hedges” at Georgia almost a dozen years before.  I left work early that Friday at noon and met, KJ, one of my partners in the venture as new owners of the Tiger Tail Team Van.  KJ had ridden with the van the week before to Arkansas where the van had the tail burned off.  (That is a story unto itself!)  We met up with Tommy, one of the original team members in Birmingham and made our way south to the van in rural Lowndes County.

We made our way down to Lowndes County where I was introduced to Lee, the owner of the van.  Lee lives out in the middle of nowhere.   I guess that’s not a bad thing when you have a van with a ten foot tail on it.  Unfortunately for me, the tail was nowhere to be seen and the back of the van was decorated with butcher paper due to damage suffered the week before.  After some brief introductions, we packed up and started to make our way south down I-65 towards Mobile. 

It wasn’t thirty minutes into the ride when Lee’s cell phone began ringing.   I was sitting shotgun and he asked me to answer it.  I was immediately asked by a friendly female voice if I would hold for Frank Broyles.  The name didn’t immediately ring a bell and I said yes to the lady.  I turned around in the van and said “Frank Broyles?” and KJ got wide eyed about the time I heard an older gentleman on the other line ask “Is this Lee?”  I said “no sir, one moment.”  At this point I handed the phone off to Lee and he began having a conversation with the University of Arkansas Athletic Director, Frank Broyles, concerning the burning of the Tiger Tail Team Van’s tail the previous Saturday at Arkansas.  I sat back and listened to the phone call before it really began to sink in; an athletic director of a major university was calling to make sure the vehicle in which I was riding was alright and asking what he could do to help.  How often does that happen?  To top it off, we were heading to an even more hostile environment called Baton Rouge, or “Red Stick” for my friends who speak “American.”  This was already shaping up to be a larger-than-life adventure.

The van continued southward, and the sunset before we reached Mobile.  We hopped on I-10 and began making our way West.  It wasn’t far past the Alabama – Mississippi Line that we began to see Katrina damage.  The trees on either side of the Interstate were littered with large debris, sometimes 30-40 feet up in the trees.  There were huge chunks of roofs, siding, pools, and anything else you can think of tangled up in their branches.  Some of the trees looked like huge Christmas trees with the amount of debris scattered in them.  Most people forget that it was the Mississippi Coast that took the brunt of Katrina’s rage.  It was a very sobering experience.  We pressed on and reached Baton Rouge sometime really late that night.  Even with my great memory, I can’t recall where we stayed that night.

I can’t recall if we met Lee’s nephew the night we got into town or the next day.  His name was Trevor and he played a central part in our LSU Game Day Experience.  Trevor was similarly aged to KJ and myself, managed a bank branch within a grocery store in Baton Rouge, had went to LSU, had been in the marching band, and maybe, just maybe was a bigger Auburn fan then I was.  You may ask yourself how someone who was born, raised, and lived in Louisiana his whole life and had all these connections to LSU, was an Auburn man?  There is a truly heartwarming story behind it I will get to in a bit.

We began our Saturday morning with Trevor driving around the van and showing us the LSU campus.  We got a lot of dirty looks and gestures among other things.  My favorite was when Trevor rolled down the window and started asking “What time is it?”   When someone would give a factual answer he would kindly respond, “No, It’s 10 to 9!” (The score of the previous year’s game which Auburn won)

Our next stop was a grocery store where Trevor’s bank branch was located.  His employees were in shock to see him decked out in all Auburn gear and seemed thoroughly confused.  We ventured on over to his parent’s house for an afternoon of food and good times prior to loading up for the game.  This is where I got the story behind Trevor’s Auburn obsession from his family.

As best as I can remember, Trevor’s older brother had been a huge Auburn fan.  Loved everything about the school and even applied there while living in Louisiana.  He was accepted into Auburn and planned on attending.  On the day before he was supposed to start his orientation, he was involved in a car accident while on the way to his Uncle Lee’s house which took his life.  Trevor was devastated at the loss of his brother, but chose to honor him by taking over his brother’s obsession and love of Auburn.  Trevor’s apartment was covered with Auburn memorabilia and he knew all there was to know about Auburn football.  Trevor was so “Dye” hard Auburn that while in the LSU marching band; he always wore an Auburn shirt underneath!  His commitment to honor his brother’s memory still amazes me to this day.

After several hours of “air conditioned tailgating” we made our way to Tiger Stadium.  Do to the fact that the Tiger Tail Team Van’s tail had been burned off during the last trip to Baton Rouge, we were given special parking.  This parking amounted to us parking in the bus lot where our van was in full view of a security guard stationed fifty feet away.   Due to the lack of people in our lot, we didn’t stick around long to tailgate and made our way over to Tiger Walk.

If there is one thing I would recommend to any Auburn fan that chooses to go on the road with the Tigers, it is to make sure you always attend the road game Tiger Walk.  They have a different energy about them that’s hard to explain and it means so much to those players to see the fans who have traveled hours to watch them play.   This was my first road game Tiger Walk and it was simply amazing.

After the Tiger Walk, we made our way into Tiger Stadium.  The concourse reminded me of Legion Field except that the air was filled with the smell of Cajun food such as crawfish, jambalaya and corn dogs.  it was like I was at a state fair.  The visiting section was located behind one of the end zones and our seats were low.  The game itself was a great game and came down to OT.  All respect to LSU fans as that is the loudest stadium I have been into date outside the ’89 Iron Bowl or the second half of the ’06 Florida game at Jordan Hare.  The game ended on John Vaughn’s fifth missed field goal of the night and would ultimately cost Auburn a return trip to Atlanta.  Regardless, it was an experience.

We managed to escape the crowds after the game without too much incident and ended up spending the night at Trevor’s apartment in Baton Rouge.  I still find it remarkable no one messed with the van at his complex.  The next morning we got up and began our long trip home and this time we were able to see the brunt of the damage that Katrina had brought on the Mississippi Coast.  Even though Auburn did not win, I count it among one of the best road trips I have taken yet.  The LSU fans were suspiciously tame, the food was great, and the atmosphere was amazing.  The only thing lacking was an Auburn win in Tiger Stadium.  I hope for the same experience with a different game result when I go back there on October 22^nd.

The Rivals Unite for Recovery Alumni Flag Football Game.

Yesterday we took the Tiger Tail Team Van out for a "test run" of sorts to the Rivals Unite for Recovery Alumni Flag Football Game at Spain Park between Auburn and Alabama.  Luckily for us, the temperature at 4:30 yesterday was quite bearable for a mid-August day.  Unluckily for us, the van decided to start having shenanigans about five miles from the school and we had to make an unexpected stop.  The short and simple of it... never good to have a brake line that seems to have a leak.

After a roughly twenty minute stop we decided to press on and made it to Spain Park without any further incident, except for some pleasant waves and honks from passerby's and the occasional obscene gesture.  Once we got to the game we managed to finagle our way into a corporate sponsored parking lot and decided to park at a place where we thought everyone would walk by.  Unfortunately for us, we were on the wrong end of the parking lot.  After over an hour and no visitors, we moved closer to the Fun Zone and parked in a place where people would have to walk by.

One thing is certain about the Tiger Tail Team Van:  It draws attention when it can be seen.  Over the next hour and a half before the game, we witnessed quite a few Auburn fans having their picture made with the van and Alabama fans taking quick pictures on their phones to send to their friends.  Regardless of allegiance, every kid wanted to walk up and get close by it or touch it.  That old beaten up tail and its fake fur still attracts a crowd.  It was entertaining to watch from a small distance.

As for the game itself, it was a lot of fun to see some ex-athletes get out on the field together for a good cause and entertain the largely mixed crowd.  It was hard to tell who was who because everyone had the number "1" on their jersey.  I felt like it may have been a tribute to Cam Newton since he changed his number in Carolina.  It was very apparent that some of the players on both teams still played football (flag) around the area and that others had stopped playing ball a long time ago.  The most impressive players had to be Siran Stacy, Adalai Trone, Kevin Lee and Kenny Irons.  They made many of the other guys look like they were moving in slow motion.

After the game was over, we moved the van to where all the football players would have to walk by it.  Some stopped by and said hello.  A few told us that they remembered the van from when they were in school and that there was no way that this was our van.  Others took a quick snapshot with their kids.  The thing that impressed me most was that both teams were mixed among one another heading to the locker rooms telling each other stories and carrying on like old friends who hadn't seen each other in awhile.  It reminded me that sometimes it is us "fanatics" that have turned this rivalry into the bitter, 365/24/7 war that it has become.

MVPS:

Adalai Trone - Auburn (A man of humorous words... one at a time)
Siran Stacy - Bama (He was the most impressive player out there for his age!)

Best Plays:

Auburn - Brandon Cox to Lee Guess for a 45 yard TD on a go route with great coverage.
Alabama - Andrew Zow to Chad Goss in the final minute of the game.  Goss laid out to make a diving catch on the turf and trust me, he's feeling it this morning.

In the end, Alabama drove 75 yards with less than two minutes to play and got a two point conversion to go up 42-41 and ultimately win the game.  What makes it funny to me is for some of those players, it was their first ever win against Auburn on the field.  One Bama fan told me I'll glad trade you our one point win here for one in November and he is right.  I doubt I will here "42-41" from anybody anytime soon til next years game. I just hope they are smart enough to have it again...

Now its off to God's Country and to meet our sponsors...

A Short History and Introduction to the Tiger Tail Team

Welcome to the Adventures of the Tiger Tail Team!  If you have found this blog it is because you either love all things Auburn or you are wanting to know the who, what, and why questions concerning the Tiger Tail Team Van.  Let me begin by saying I don’t have all the answers concerning the van just yet.  What I can tell you is that the Tiger Tail Van began sometime in the early 90’s, has been through several tails and has seen over two hundred and ninety seven thousand miles during its illustrious life.  During that time it has had two tails burned off of it and has survived any further damage through sheer luck.

In May of this year, the original owner contacted my friend and asked if he would be interested in taking over the Tiger Tail Van and forming a new team to carry on the tradition.  He agreed to and began forming a new Tiger Tail Team.  In June we took a short drive to Lowndes County where the Tiger Tail Van has spent her off seasons undisturbed by man, roaming back country roads awaiting football season.  At first she was hesitant to leave her traditional off season grounds, but eventually took to the roads and began heading north towards her new summering grounds in the Birmingham area.  She now has a new home and new owners who are looking to expand the tradition associated with the Tiger Tail Team.  Don’t be surprised if you see her driving around Birmingham or even show up at various non-football events.  It is our intent to take her to every home and away game this year and I plan to use this blog to tell the many stories that happen when the Tiger Tail Team goes on the road.